Friday, May 22, 2009

Quiet and Witty

Thanks to those of you who signed the guest book in response to our Marijuana Shirt Conundrum. Your advice and all your funny comments were most helpful. Not to mention entertaining. It's nice to know that we have a virtual community of friends that can help us through the sticky wickets of life.

Actually, I'm not sure if I just used sticky wickets the proper way but I've always wanted to find a way to incorporate sticky wickets into my writing. And that means that I have just fulfilled one of my Life Goals!

There now. Wasn't that easy?

That's just one example of why it's good to set the bar low when it comes to goal setting. What if one of my goals had been to climb Mt. Kilimanjaro? Do you think I could have accomplished THAT in ten seconds on a Friday morning? I think not.

So what have we learned, boys and girls? Set SMALL goals for yourself!

(I'm kidding, okay?)

Which brings me to an interesting query that I always love talking with people about. Have you set any "life goals" for yourself that you have reached? Or have you set some goals that you haven't yet reached but you are quite certain that you will?

What are they? Do tell! I think we could all use some inspiration today and what's more inspiring than hearing about a variety of goals that have been reached? (Or are at least reachable!) I promise you that you'll have plenty of avid avid readers if you'll write something.

And speaking of inspiration, I could definitely use some extra "inspiration sprinkles" in my life right about now.

The last couple days have not been easy ones for me. I'm started to feel "soggy" (Sarah's term for not feeling happy) and disheartened about how long this whole transition process is taking. And because of that stress (among others), it seems like I've been tempted to cry over any ol' thing.

For instance, yesterday I was in Wal Mart and ran into an old church friend. We chatted a minute and she closed the conversation by saying how much she loved us and missed us.

That was it. Just a few words.

Well, those few words set my tear ducts to hoppin'. (If tear ducts can indeed hop.) I quickly made my way to the sparsely populated bread department and stared furiously at the selections of wheat bread while sniffling my way through five Kleenex and trying to get a grip. I was concentrating on keeping my back turned to the store and hoping that no one would come near and wonder why the sight of a hundred loaves of wheat bread was reducing me to tears.

Woman Found Weeping In Wal Mart Bread Aisle. Story at Eleven!

I feel stressed right now over a lot of things but especially the thought of moving and finding my place in a new town, community and church. I think about the challenge of finding a dozen "replacement" doctors and specialists for Sarah's long term follow up and I think about Sarah having to start at a new school in the 8th grade--probably one of the most difficult ages to make a new start. (Plus, she'll be wearing hearing aids which won't make the transition any easier.) And of course, if you've ever moved, there are many other things to worry in advance about, as well.

Hmmmm. I think that "worrying in advance" may very well be one of my gifts! In fact, I can worry in advance, I can worry while going through something and then I am also able to worry while looking back at it. Although I may make it look very easy to do,
don't try this at home!

Anyway, as hard as the whole transition thing is to contemplate, it makes it all the harder that it's not happening yet. And the longer we wait, the more stressed I feel. And then I end up crying in Wal Mart.

And eating Little Debbie snack cakes.

I don't suppose anyone out there can relate? At least to the snack cakes? Someone? Anyone?

After I got home from Wal Mart yesterday, Steve and Nathan helped me unload my groceries and then the three of us ate lunch together. I was trying to pull my fragile, enfeebled emotions together and make an attempt to be somewhat cheery but after about six minutes Nathan gave me one of his intuitive glances and said, "Mom, you seem to be in a funny mood."

I looked at him with great innocence and said, "Funny? What do you mean by funny?"

He said, "Well, you're saying your usual interesting and witty things but you seem kind of quiet. Like you're being sort of quiet and witty at the same time. Are you okay?"

I had to smile at his keen observation. Nathan is the kind of guy who doesn't always say a whole lot but he's always watching, observing, and noticing things other people overlook. I wasn't at all surprised that he stuck a proverbial finger in the air and got a "reading" on which way the emotional winds were blowing. He will make some woman a great husband, especially in the "feelings department."

And he is already making "some woman" a great son. I do love my oldest male child enormously and am so thankful to have him home for the summer.

Steve is glad to have him around, too. Especially today, when the next job on his To Do List was to stain the deck. Don't they look like they're having a swell time? (Double click on picture to make it larger.)




They're outside being productive and I'm inside being quiet.

And witty.

And eating snack cakes.

Hey, it works for me!

11 Had Something To Say (Just click here!):

Anonymous said...

Mary H here - since I can't remember by Google password - I am now Anonymous - that's not so bad, really!

I am not great on goal setting - I guess my one goal is to get through each day, smile as much as possible, especially at people who seem to need it more than others and get them to respond, even slightly - then when I go to bed and get up the next day - which is another goal (to reach the next day and see what it holds) - I have achieved a yet another goal -every day - therefore, I triumph over goals constantly - makes me feel accomplished, in a very unceremonial and simple way but setting a "real" goal is very daunting to me - too many things could make me fail - I am not good at failure - so, I set mini goals - just like using "sticky wicket" - hey, it works!

Becky, is there any way to look at another side of your new life direction. That may not make any sense to you but maybe you are stuck at a crossroads or in that hallway still for a reason - God many have completely different ideas for you and is just waiting for you to think outside of the box. Just a thought, wish there was more I could do to help - these are different and unusual times for many now, maybe the traditional solutions are not the ones to seek.

Hope your weekend is good - maybe a family picnic somewhere is in order - get outside, go somewhere fun and free and feel like you have escaped for a few hours - I am going to try and put that together for myself - a mini vacation - ah, yes, another mini goal. God Love you all!

Sue G said...

Well, my friend, a funny thing happened in the middle of the night last night (this morning?). I was lying in bed, tossing and turning, tuning in to a rerun of Cold Case, when a picture of you came into my mind (well, nice to know something can come into my mind at three in the morning!). I can't describe the picture, but the feeling made me think, "I wonder how Becky is doing during the transition in her life right now. I think she should write about it. I'll have to email her in the morning."

And here you are!

The writing I meant, however, was not on the blog. I was thinking that in this economy with so many families' lives upended, it would be good to write a magazine piece about transition--the hallways--and how people traverse through them. I think that would be very marketable.

Anyway, sorry to hear you are in a funk. Waiting can be difficult, I know. But God has a purpose in everything, and I am confident His purpose in this "life interruption" is important. Meanwhile, it is up to you to travel through this time in faith and with an open heart.

I know you do that, Becky. I know your heart is always open. And I know you are always in faith. You couldn't write about all the miracles in your life if you didn't see them firsthand. And you can't see miracle and be unsure of Who is in control.

Sometimes it is difficult to be comforted by that thought. But then I look at the joy of having Nathan and Sarah home all summer, of having Steve be fully present and uninterrupted by board meetings and sermon preparations, of inhaling the rich aromas that comprise your life...and I know you are okay. I know that God's purpose in this hallway is a gift to you of time with your family. And I know that He will move you to the perfect place when the time is right.

So, my friend, when you think of goals to set, think of who you will be in that new place, how you look, how you feel, what you will want to accomplish. Think of all the ways your life can honor and glorify Him no matter where you are or whether you are in life's rooms or hallways. Think of everything your heart desires and trust that God already knows and is making plans accordingly.

And you may just be surprised to learn that the gifts have already started arriving. You just have to unwrap them.

Even when the wrappers say Little Debbie.

Anonymous said...

Anonymous Mary H - Again -

Just to send out a thank you publicly to Becky. When I read her blog today and thought about how she, in spite of her difficult day, reached out to me by e-mail yesterday to offer comfort and support as I deal with the declining health of my dear friend who is losing her fight against cancer. She covered me with a blanket of faith and prayer and friendship. I so needed that.

Sue G.'s thoughts are remarkable. Becky, please read them over and over - I am sure you will find many answers, if not THE answer, within them.

Anonymous said...

Hi dear Beck,

I am very sorry things are so hard right now. As usual, I can't seem to come up with any wise or inspiring words. But then I read Sue G.s wonderfully wise and inspiring words and decided to shamelessly plagerize (sp?) them and say, "Ditto!"--that's what I would say if I knew how! Thank you, Sue, for using your gifts of wisdom and insight to encourage my sister. Actually, I'm encouraged too. It's hard to see people I love go through such hard, inexplicable things and your words bring hope and perspective.

And Beck, as others have said before in previous entries, you're not in the waiting room or the hallway alone--we're all in there with you! So scoot over, will ya? :-)

Love,
Deb

Wyatt said...

Debbie McKee (Little Debbie) was four years old in 1960 when her grandparents decided to use her name and image in the snack cake company logo.

My father and his brother partnered to bring the very first Little Debbie franchise to North Carolina in 1962. They mortgaged their homes and tapped their savings to pay the franchise fee, purchase a new delivery van and buy their first inventory of snack cakes -- Oatmeal Creme Pies and Devil Creme Cakes.

Little Debbie -- medicine for the soul.

Marysienka said...

This transition period must be really stressful. I'm sorry you have to go through this. As always I'm keeping you in my thoughts!

And now, about goals...
My biggest goal was to become a doctor. It was a dream of mine since age 6. At 10 yrs old, I became really sick (my grandmother actually wondered if I would make it to the end of the summer!). I was eventually diagnosed with crohn's disease (after thinking for weeks it was probably lymphoma or leukemia) and I missed weeks (that became months) of school from age 10 to 18 (hospital = 2nd home!). Luckily, I was able to homeschool myself and could keep up with school work. I applied in medicine. And here I am, living my dream for 4 years now :)

Another goal of mine was to meet Patch Adams (the real one!). And I did (just a few months before being accepted in medschool!) :0) That was awesome!

Sorry that was long!!

R. in Canada
marysienka.blogspot.com

Random said...

Life goals... mine are simply stated and almost impossible to actually do. I want to get my PhD in cancer research, and I want to live a sustainable and environmentally-friendly lifestyle. Yes, to the point of growing food and using reusable everything and buying the fancy groceries. Eventually. If I ever have money.

As for the transition... transitions are always hard, even when you're heading for something you know is right for you and your family. And sometimes they take longer than you think they will. Much longer. Ridiculously longer.
But maybe it's a good thing that you can't find something - a new job, a new house - that will suffice. Maybe that's good, because if you don't take something that "will do," maybe something will come along that is perfect, instead.
Maybe. Or maybe life is sometimes just difficult so that we can learn to love what we do have (a lesson I get from your family on a daily basis). If so, then come on already, new opportunities! The Smith family is ready!

Anonymous said...

I find transitions rough, too. Anticipating big changes is especially difficult, because there's nothing to DO but wait and dread...when the moment comes, you can face it head on, but until then, you just have to wait and know that you have the fortitude to face the future.

But as for Sarah's hearing aids, I think they will make her transition easier rather than harder. It's much, much easier to fit in when you can clearly hear and understand everything going on around you! (This I know from experience.) And while eighth graders can be difficult, they can also be unexpectedly kind.

JG from WI

Karen H - Hammond, IN said...

I needed an almost-midnight snack and decided to sit in front of the desktop to consume it... can you believe I just had Little Debbie Snack Cakes? The Swiss Rolls to be precise!

Angie said...

You may worry "in advance" but lucky for you -- and those of us who share your worrying habits ;] -- our God works in advance. We may not know what tomorrow holds, but we know who holds tomorrow. Praying for you to feel the peace that passes all understanding. His grace is sufficient.

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