"Oh, for crying out loud!" you may say. "How bad could it possibly be?"
Um. This bad.
Do you see my eyes boring straight into you and repeating, "THIS BAD?"
Can you see me looking around sadly for help? For assistance? For a miracle? Anything?
Sigh.
I am very happy to report to you that even in the midst of my Extreme Hair Trauma, I didn't have a melt down or even a break down. I just said to myself, "Well, that's pretty upsetting but as far as I know the sun is going to rise tomorrow and my family will still love me. Even though I have the worst array of bangs the world has ever seen.
Sigh. Again.
The young lady who cut my hair has given me several excellent cuts in the past. I started going to her because she worked at a reputable salon and had a half price coupon in the paper. And you know how I am about a bargain.
I really liked her. And I still do. I know that all of us make mistakes no matter what our jobs are. It's just that, well, I'm a wee bit traumatized about having to wear the mistake for the next few weeks.
Actually, what she was trying to accomplish (per my request) were bangs like these, modeled for you by my lovely sister Debbie, who is seen here with a certain wild and wacky companion who shall remain nameless. (Hi, Nathan!)
I love Debbie's spikey bangs look so much that I printed off the picture and I showed it to my stylist.
And I got this.
I tried to remind myself that I am a mature, grown up person. I do not get upset over these kinds of petty occurrences. I try to look at the big picture of life. I try to appreciate how small this incident is in comparison to the large things going in peoples' lives.
But then I look at this. Again.
And then I feel compelled to not be a grown up anymore. I feel compelled to run to my room and cry. And throw something. And then follow that up with eating four pounds of chocolate.
With nuts.
And just so you know? I've never been overly particular about wearing fancy schmancy clothes or buying the latest styles; however, there is one appearance-related issue that is very dear to my heart. And that is-- my bangs. This is what they're supposed to look like.
Oops sorry. Wrong picture.
This is what they're supposed to look like.
The sad fact of the matter is that I possess a very high forehead and because of that, I have worn long bangs my whole life. In fact, until this week, it was not known for sure whether I even had a forehead, because it had never before been seen.
Folks. I DO have a forehead. And after this haircut, there will be absolutely no more doubt about that it because unfortunately, people will have to gaze upon it for many weeks to come.
And I so badly wanted to look wonderfully put together when we go to Manteo in two weeks. Oh well. I guess they can witness me at my worst now and then I'll just get better looking as time goes by.
Or not.
I'm really sorry to be laying this Hair Burden on you and I do sincerely hope that looking at pictures of my hair and my really high, alarming, never-before-seen forehead doesn't cause you to have nightmares.
But if I can't turn to you, my blogging buds, who can I turn to?
Sarah and Steve have already gone through their laundry list of compassionate, commiserative remarks but I am still really needing a few more rounds of comfort in order to assuage the massive amount of Hair Grief that I'm currently experiencing.
Anyway, thanks for listening.
I am now leaving the room.
To eat chocolate. And cry.
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With great trepidation I washed and styled my hair after I got up, wondering if I could somehow "mush" my remaining hair strands around so that they would cover up the areas that are lacking. (Sort of like a "comb over," I suppose.)
Here is the result of my labors.
Not QUITE as bad as it looked last night.
The Extreme Hair Trauma Chapter is now coming to a close and I do believe that I will survive. I just hope my previously sheltered and non-publicized forehead is up to the challenge of being on display for the next few weeks. We'll see!
Now. Since I've already thoroughly embarrassed myself by showing you pictures of my adult hair when it is less than fabulous, I'll entrust you with some other "interesting" pictures of myself from past years. (You may laugh with me, but not at me.)
Don't you love the little curl over my right ear?
I was probably around 12 or 13 here; as you can tell, I didn't have the first clue about make up or hair styling.
My brother, Phil's, wedding. And in case you're wondering, I'm the one wearing the large green hat which was what all of us cool and groovy bridesmaids wore back in the 70's. (I know, I know. You're jealous.)
And here's an interesting bit of family trivia for you:
My mom is the only woman I know who wore the same dress to all SIX of her childrens' weddings! She never changed in size and the style was classic enough to just keep on wearing. I just think that is so cool.
Interesting hair from early in our marriage years . . .
. . . and early singing years. (That's my sisters with Steve and me.)
And finally, in an effort to exorcise all the terrible hair sights you have been exposed to today on this blog, I will close with a couple pictures of my mom.
Beautiful hair, beautiful face, beautiful heart.
When I grow up, I want to be like her.
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Comment/Question Corner
Krista, the burners were just under $100 for four of them. We got ours at Lowes.
Mel, thanks so much for the packing tip! We will definitely remember that and use it. Packing tips of ALL kinds are welcome.
Mom to Ella, yes Manteo is definitely a hurricane zone, just like any town near the ocean. Thankfully, in recent years, a second bridge off the island has been built so I feel better knowing we can leave if necessary. We talked to one old-timer who's only left once in twenty years, so we'll see!
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In a few minutes, we'll be packing up the van and heading out for a ten hour trip to Florida. Tomorrow is going to be a challenging day trying to recover from today's travel and also singing and preaching in a church in Orlando at 10 am, then traveling 2 1/2 hours to sing and preach at another church at 6:30 pm. It's been many years since I have had to do two services in one day with a lot of travel in between. With my recent vocal problems, it will be even more of a challenge. Thanks for your prayers; I'll let you know how it goes.
Monday, we'll have lunch with Nathan on campus and do our best to find how many ways we can find to embarrass him. :-) Monday night, we are headed to his girlfriends' house (her parents are some of our dearest friends) for Nate's 20th birthday cookout. Tuesday, it's ten hours back home again.
I'll try to be in touch along the way to let you know how my forehead is faring . . . (smile)